prettiest baby boy,, flower 4 loml

a collection of ramblings for u & about u

• i'm sick of grandiose metaphors, gods and celestial bodies. oh to be the simplest things: a ringlet curl around your fingertips, brushed through to ease your discomfort. oh to warm you as the humble heater, light you as the languid lamp. to serve you through my very life, even simply by existing. wherein your room a setting's laid for me, upon your bed my body belongs. how right, like the knife to the left of the fork, like the plate centrified in the dining hall. can't you feel it, my displacement? the whole world tilts, i lose my footing. can't you feel it, when you leave me here? my room's a prison from which i craft my coffin. remember me, dear lover, before the dirt claims my last breath. i live to love you.
• will you wait while i fold my laundry? i want to clean myself up for you. will you love me as i take my medications? i talk to you about irrelevant things in the daylight. you heal the child that's hiding behind the mean face. you are my miracle. i want to be your angel. no, i want to be the peasant worshipping at your statue. you are a symbol and you are a reality. you are my love and you are a corporeal body. i see you shine inside and out. i see you so beautifully.
• your hands, strong yet gentle; your heart so full and sturdy; these i can never lend. these i will spit and fight to defend. because i don't need to tell you, do i? how love is not quite the dinner reservation, nor the designer handbag. how love is the coffee in the morning, and the crooked kiss on the corner of my mouth, and you in the back of a crowded room- waiting for me to finish speaking at the front.
• You are the brightest star in my universe and you are the warmth of afternoon sunlight streaming through the windowpanes. You are the same golden green of growth as the trees we sat under to eat tacos today, your skin glowing where the sunlight gilded you. And you are the inky embrace of the midnight sky. The same velvet warmth. Your eyes shimmer like a mirror, hinting at your own reflective nature. You are often too hard on yourself. I know. Be kind, you are doing so well and facing so much. I love you beyond the infinity you bark to. I love you catastrophically and I love you casually. I love you with every heartbeat and every breath and every firing neuron. I could write you forever and never encapsulate it all. But I hope this begins to capture a fraction of this, my love.